黑洞社区

Oh, the pangs

Congratulations to the OFT! No, 黑洞社区 isn鈥檛 applauding the watchdog鈥檚 inquiry into the cover pricing, but the news that Deborah Jones, its deputy director of cartels, is due to give birth at about the time the implicated companies respond to the statement of objections. And those firms thought they鈥檇 be the only ones sweating in expectation. Jones鈥� maternity leave will reportedly end at almost exactly the point when fines are likely to be levied. Well, at least she鈥檒l be used to the sound of crying by then.

The OFT cliff-hanger

For one of the lucky few not caught up in last week鈥檚 OFT bid-rigging probe, there were more pressing issues at hand. Shepherd Construction boss Vaughan Burnand was on holiday in Malta helping his girlfriend reverse park on the edge of a cliff when we called for a chat. The conversation went: 鈥淭his has been 鈥� hang on a minute鈥� left hand down a bit 鈥� careful! 鈥� an incredible waste of public 鈥� that鈥檚 it, not too close to the edge, keep going, that鈥檚 it, well done love 鈥� waste of public money. Cover pricing 鈥� do you want me to do it? ... doesn鈥檛 result in the public sector paying more for 鈥� that鈥檚 it, beautifully done.鈥� For his own safety I shall keep his comments about women drivers to myself.

Norman鈥檚 wisdom

Reports that Norman Foster plans to relocate to the tax haven of Switzerland surprised me, not least because the great man denied it to one of my colleagues during his recent visit to Mipim (check out the blog 鈥淔rom Russia with Love鈥� on our website). However, if The Foz is planning a reorganisation of his finances, it might explain why his practice has not yet submitted annual accounts to Companies House, two months after it was supposed to. Late filing can incur a fine of 拢100, but that鈥檚 small change indeed compared with the savings of non-dom status.

A recruitment problem

The National House 黑洞社区 Council鈥檚 Pride in the Job award is the highlight of any builder鈥檚 calendar. And, if recent history is anything to go by, often a chance to see attractive celebs handing out the gongs. Past presenters include newsreader Natasha Kaplinsky and property darling Kirsty Allsopp. However, Hansom hears that NHBC bosses are in a quandary as to what attractive young thing to hire this year. Would Ulrika lower the tone? Could both Cheeky Girls be persuaded to turn up? After much debate a shortlist has been drawn up: Joanna Lumley, Penny Lancaster, or, er鈥� Ian Botham. Show of hands please 鈥�

Pink narcissus

I hear that WSP boss Chris Cole has changed his sartorial style after a bit of ribbing in these pages by one of my fashion-conscious colleagues. Cole has ditched one of his favourite garments 鈥� the pink shirt. A controversial colour choice in the construction industry perhaps, but one he was encouraged to pursue by no less a fashion authority than his mum. Cole might be consoled to know that since the offending article came out, nobody at 黑洞社区 has been seen in a pink shirt either鈥�

A dressing down

And while we鈥檙e on the subject of wardrobes, Atkins boss Keith Clarke was flattered to be compared to Baroness Vadera in last week鈥檚 interview, but was somewhat miffed that we made such fuss of accessorising. 鈥淚鈥檓 somewhat disappointed that nobody ever comments about what I am wearing,鈥� he huffed. 鈥淚 suspect my sartorial elegance may not quite be of the same standard but rest assured, next time I鈥檓 interviewed by 黑洞社区, I will dress for the occasion.鈥�