黑洞社区

Foster鈥檚 children

Sometimes even the most powerful architect in the UK has to admit defeat. Word reaches me of Norman Foster鈥檚 consternation when informed of an unacceptably high turnover of staff one year. My spies tell me Lord Foster stormed down to the HR department to get to the root of the problem. Unfortunately, and unbeknown to Foster, said department had a door code. Staff then watched as their boss hammered on the door to gain entry. On finally doing so, Foster grilled the first cowering staff member in his path. 鈥淚鈥檓 sorry, I don鈥檛 know,鈥� came the timid response. 鈥淚鈥檓 new here 鈥︹��

Upstaged

Delegates at the Barking and Dagenham Housing Strategy conference could have been forgiven for thinking they were in the wrong place. In a change from the usual facts and figures, the organisers had commissioned a drama group for a series of roleplays. Two actors portrayed an angry local resident and an ODPM Sustainable Communities wonk. To general terror, they then asked the audience for hints on how to behave. One brave soul suggested the ODPM man sit down when speaking to the resident, to appear less threatening. The resident/actor was having none of it. 鈥淚 don鈥檛 want you to sit down, I want you to answer my question,鈥� she shrieked. So much for the experts.

Sky鈥檚 the limit

Disturbing news from Downing Street, where Tony Blair鈥檚 鈥渂lue-skies thinker鈥�, ex-BBC director general John Birt, had a lucky escape when his office ceiling collapsed. Birt, who often irks departments because he has a free-ranging brief over policy, is regarded with suspicion by some ministers. Some think the incident might hasten the stalled 拢30m refurb of Number 10. Others were more flippant. 鈥淗e鈥檚 got a clear view of the blue sky from which to draw inspiration now,鈥� said one wag.

There鈥檚 gratitude for you

It seems there is some ill-advised snobbery at work in the Tate Modern. Word reaches me that senior Tate officials are unhappy with the current exhibition by architect Herzog & de Meuron, which they feel is not 鈥減roper art鈥�. Some consider the display to be a commercial exhibition, and claim the Swiss practice should be made to pay to use the space. What鈥檚 the betting those same critics would consider their own fair building 鈥� the architect鈥檚 most famous UK project 鈥� a work of art? Two words suffice: ungrateful philistines.

How illuminating

Dire Straits frontman Mark Knopfler is in no danger of being lost in obscurity, especially if his new house is anything to go by. The 80s rocker has had aeroplane-style floor lighting installed in his mansion on the bank of the Solent, enabling the corridors to light up should he need to walk through them at night. Given that Knopfler intends to use the property for one month a year, the hugely expensive system seems a clear case of Money for Nothing.

Brownfield of dreams

More spinning from the ODPM lands in my in-tray. Bright young housing minister Yvette Cooper recently lauded the volume of housing built on brownfield land as being at a 鈥渉istorically high level鈥�, despite the fact that the percentage has actually stalled at 67% for the past three years. Recent data by the National Land Use Database of Previously Developed Land for 2004 in fact shows that the amount of vacant/derelict brownfield land available has fallen 7% to 38,200 ha. Doh!

Kids rule OK
Good news for those who believe architects鈥� degrees should be shortened. Architect Design Heroine has teamed up with 12-year-old Camden schoolgirls to design a life-sized school. The approach is intended to 鈥渆ncourage students to believe in their own raw and creative visions undoctored by 鈥榩rofessional鈥� interpretations鈥�. Apparently, the girls combined model-making, drawing, narrative and theatre, team work, film and 3D space-making to develop their ideas about creating an ideal learning environment. Presumably consisting of no classrooms, a jail for teachers and an ultracool bike shed to smoke behind.