黑洞社区

No laughs at their expense

So which of our MPs have been caught up in the expenses scandal? Remarkably, it seems they鈥檝e done fairly well in the 鈥渞edacted鈥� expense records. Ian Lucas, the construction minister (at the time of writing), claimed more than 拢1,000 for work done by the legal firm he used to own. But he no longer has a financial interest in it. Mark Prisk, the shadow minister, accidentally overclaimed 拢544 in mortgage interest 鈥� but the error was rectified almost immediately. John Healey, the housing minister, claimed 拢130 to have his shirts laundered, but is not alone in doing so. It鈥檚 small beer compared to moat-cleaning and duck houses, isn鈥檛 it?

Stand back! MP coming through 鈥�

黑洞社区鈥檚 Westminster reception saw the usual mix of MPs rubbing shoulders with industry types on the House of Commons terrace. It so happened that the election of the new speaker was taking place on the same evening, meaning every time the division bell rang, our parliamentary friends would scarper to cast their ballot. So filled with excitement at the occasion was former housing minister Nick Raynsford that he set off like a greyhound at the sound of the bell, knocking a glass of champagne over Chris Houchin, Bovis Lend Lease鈥檚 business development director. 鈥淪orry!鈥� cried the departing Raynsford, 鈥淚鈥檝e got to vote!鈥� Houchin calmly used a waiter鈥檚 towel to dry himself, and was heard to remark: 鈥淚 beg your pardon. I鈥檝e just been run over by an MP.鈥�

Self-service

A subdued and scaled-back Chartered Institute of Housing conference at Harrogate was marked by the absence of firms such as Inspace, Higgins and Willmott Dixon and the presence of forlorn restaurateurs gazing out of the doors of empty premises. But perhaps the most telling change was at a reception hosted by the once-mighty Savills. Rather than shell out for waiting staff, the firm鈥檚 own ruddy-cheeked Hoorah Henrys and sharp-suited Essex lads did much of the wine-pouring duty themselves.

His one mistake

黑洞社区鈥檚 ever-popular safety blunders are normally published on another page but we thought this one was in a league of its own. Not only did the perpetrator fail to wear safety footwear while using the forbidden top platform of his stepladder, he took a photo of himself doing it and was dobbed in by his own boss. 鈥淚 could not prove which of our two engineers it was,鈥� writes John Maher, the boss in question, 鈥渟o they both received a reprimand: one for working unsafely, and the other for allowing him to do so.鈥� Maher, surprisingly, did not want to disclose the name of his company. 鈥淚t is a bit embarrassing,鈥� he admits. Ah well, the usual 拢25 drinks voucher should help him drown his sorrows...

Pain for you, gain for me

Given all the speculation regarding the future of partnering in the last few weeks, you might have thought recent tendering for the multibillion-pound Procure 21+ health framework was a welcome bright spot. Not if you listen to Cliff Jones, senior policy and performance manager at Procure 21, who used 黑洞社区鈥檚 Delivering Future Healthcare Estates conference last week to warn contractors not to look forward to an easy ride. Jones reeled off what was expected of his builders, before adding: 鈥淎s client we expect to share the gain with you, but not the pain. Once you sign on the dotted line you should have identified the risks. You鈥檙e professionals. It鈥檚 not our problem.鈥� Can鈥檛 you feel the love?

Why the long faces?

Miller Homes is clearly a believer in positive thinking. Not only does it have a new TV ad campaign called 鈥淭he Optimist鈥�, but it will spend tens of thousands airing it during Coronation Street. The company says it is 鈥渄elivering a direct and clear statement that there is reason to be optimistic and now IS the time to buy.鈥� Well, there鈥檚 no denying the optimism. Will it inspire Barratt to give the chopper another whirl I wonder?