黑洞社区

Paper trial

Ernst & Young has been allotted the grim task of picking through the remains of collapsed Shropshire contractor Wrekin. Administrator Ian Best has wearily admitted it may take over a year to untangle the inter-company debts of parent group Tamar. And then there鈥檚 the small matter of the 拢11m ruby used to shore up Wrekin鈥檚 balance sheet that, it turns out, is worth considerably less. Such complexity has generated some pretty formidable paperwork. I鈥檓 told it has been stacked floor to ceiling in the 400ft2 training room at Wrekin鈥檚 HQ. We hope Ian can tunnel his way out some time this year.

Irony supplement

A fortnight ago, we printed a photo of a man in a high-vis vest with 鈥淲e鈥檒l never die鈥� on the back, next to a man wearing a vest from collapsed contractor Verry. Alas, our assertion that this was a Man U slogan is apparently incorrect. 鈥淭he gentleman is almost certainly a Luton Town fan,鈥� writes Steve Hall of Southern Housing Group. 鈥淭he vests were adopted after the FA decided to deduct 30 points from the team for going into administration.鈥� Thanks, Steve. Seems as if the irony was even greater than we thought, then 鈥� 

No snooze is good snooze

The industrious spirit of the 4,000-odd Olympic site workers has been widely and justly celebrated in recent months. So it was good to see one of the hardworking multitude taking a well-deserved kip in a rowing boat on one of the park鈥檚 waterways last Friday morning. His timing may not have gone down too well in head office, however 鈥� the London Organising Committee of the Olympic Games happened to be taking a busload of journalists past at the time. Is there such a thing as a good snooze story?

Credit: Morten Morland

Neither use nor ornament

Little Britain alert! The recycling division of Lincolnshire-based construction firm Lindum Group has noticed a radical increase in the number of garden gnomes being thrown away. Concerned for the fate of these usually merry fellows, Lindum has opened a 鈥渞etirement home鈥� to accommodate them. Chairman David Chambers says: 鈥淲e have 80 in the business park gardens here 鈥� we feel sorry for them.鈥� If you鈥檙e in the area, Lindum鈥檚 鈥済nomes away from home鈥� can be visited in the Lindum Business Park, North Hykeham.

Chopper shopper

Question: the sustainability director of which large consultant not only drives a flash sports car but has also recently passed his helicopter pilot鈥檚 licence? Green expert during the week, it seems his weekends are spent with gas-guzzling machines, including regularly hiring a copter to take his wife into the country for a 鈥溌�500 cup of tea鈥�. The mystery man knows it doesn鈥檛 look good, but he says he loves the hobby so much he can鈥檛 help it. I guess even eco types occasionally feel the need for speed 鈥�

Once, twice, three times a divorc茅

Being a building inspector clearly introduces you to people from all walks of life, was the message from a documentary on Channel 4 last week. The 黑洞社区 Inspector is Coming followed three inspectors around Birmingham and introduced us to one particularly colourful self-builder, George Galvin. The cross-dressing pre-op transsexual was pondering the failure of his third marriage to camera. 鈥淪he鈥檚 quite upset about it,鈥� he mused, referring to wife Marlene鈥檚 decision to move into the house next door. Fairly understandable? Clearly not for George, who added: 鈥淚t鈥檚 the same reason my first two wives left me, actually.鈥� Poor old George had to cancel his operation to pay for his new roof. Clearly building an extension was more important than getting rid of one.