黑洞社区

 Miracle berries are a strange fruit. They make sour food taste sweet. Bompas politely asks the waiter if, along with our cocktails, we could have a sliced lemon and a bowl of vinegar. Bizarrely, the lemon tastes like a sugary sweet, and the vinegar like warm syrup. I don鈥檛 like what this is doing to my insides. 鈥淲e鈥檙e working with the Institute of Food Research to extract the active ingredient,鈥� says Bompas, breezily. 鈥淭hen we can throw taste parties.鈥�

A taste party would involve guests sitting around and eating a meal of pickled vegetables and lemon pulp dipped in soy sauce. 鈥淚n New York, they call it flavour-tripping,鈥� says Parr.

A taste party would involve guests sitting around and eating a meal of pickled vegetables and lemon pulp dipped in soy sauce

It has to be said, our chosen venue would be more appropriate for a bad taste party. There are statues of Tutankhamun on the walls, one of the tables is inside a giant urn, and the greatest hits of Andrew Lloyd Webber are raging on the stereo. On the walls of the toilets is Victorian pornography, and the cocktails are called things like Rameses鈥� passion and bleeding Cleopatra. 鈥淚鈥檒l have a multiple orgasm, please鈥� says Charlotte. 鈥淥kay,鈥� I slur. 鈥淎nd what will you have to drink?鈥� I鈥檝e had too much vinegar. It turns out Bompas & Parr have quite a few plans up their sleeves after the success of the London Festival of Architecture鈥檚 jelly banquet, including a Boris Johnson-themed restaurant, an experiment to change the structure of Ferrero Rocher so that they stack like in the TV adverts (鈥淲e鈥檝e been watching a lot of YouTube videos,鈥� says Parr), and a burger bar with happy meals designed by architect CZWG. Parr tells me they鈥檙e also working with celebrity chef Heston Blumenthal to improve the structural quality of jelly.

Recently, they also made a jelly room for the musician Mark Ronson鈥檚 birthday party. Parr brings out a test sample. 鈥淲e made it with absinthe,鈥� he explains. 鈥淚t鈥檚 exceptionally strong.鈥�

I鈥檒l have a multiple orgasm, please鈥� says Charlotte. 鈥極kay,鈥� I slur. 鈥楢nd what will you have to drink?

The evening descends yet further into surreal anarchy as Bompas explains the origin of our fezes. 鈥淭hey used to belong to my grandfather. He was a shriner.鈥� A shriner, apparently, is the American version of a Freemason.

鈥淒o they get treated specially, like the masons do?鈥� asks Parr. 鈥淣o, it鈥檚 just a hat,鈥� says Bompas. But what a hat.

We discuss the possibilities of Bompas & Parr staging an event at the Conservative party conference. Bompas admits he campaigns for the Tories in Southwark. 鈥淭here are only 20 Tories registered in the whole ward, so it鈥檚 not much of a campaign,鈥� he admits. I have a feeling, as I take another mouthful of absinthe jelly, that Bompas & Parr are going to do well under a Conservative regime.